
So I spotted a story about MEGADETH frontman Dave Mustaine releasing his very own autobiography titled "Mustaine: A Heavy Metal Memoir" next month. Surprising, but only because I assumed the title would be "Mustaine: The Guy Who Really Wrote The First Metallica Record." *rimshot*
Love him or hate him, Mustaine is an intriguing guy (and an egomaniac), so the thought of listening to him rant for 350+ pages is interesting. Especially since he was one of those "heroin makes me awesome" musicians in the 90's. Mustaine has gone through a lot of self-loathing in his career, so I hope this is interesting instead of a "my life has sucked post-Metallica and that's why I did drugs and was an asshole" ramblings.
So, this led me to officially end the debate of Metallica vs Megadeth once and for all using my scale(s) of awesomeness.
Let's begin!
Metallica

GOOD

Metallica began the 80's with a bang with Kill 'Em All (Mustaine will tell you he co-wrote this, which he probably did), and started the movement known as thrash metal.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

Not only does Ride the Lightning sport one of the best album covers ever (electric chairs FTW), but it features Creeping Death, which is my favorite Metallica song. What does that mean? Well, it just means it's my favorite Metallica song.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

Is Master of Puppets the greatest thrash record of all-time? No. However, it still rules, and anyone who discredits the influence this record had on a generation of headbangers shall be dee-stroyed.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

They finished off the 80's with the riff library known as ...And Justice For All. I say riff library, because everyone song has so many riffs, that it's like 3 albums in 1. Yes, that was an exact calculation.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

Metallica started the 90's with arguably the most successful metal album of all-time with the Black Album. Once you're on top, there is nowhere to go but down, as evidenced by their slow descent into TERRIBLE FUCKING MUSIC.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

A. Metallica gets points for keeping arguably the same line-up through the years. Following the unfortunate death of bass player Cliff Burton, his replacement Jason Newsted lasted until St. Anger was released.
B. Metallica has been a goldmine of heavy riffage in the 80's, and the Black Album riffs are fumbled over by wannabe guitarists in Guitar Center everyday. The Justice album seems to have 20 riffs packed into every song, so Metallica gets major points for riffage. An automatic deduction for post-Black Album riffage. When you're best post Black Album record is an album full of covers, well, that's a problem.
C. Metallica gets extra points for writing songs like Master of Puppets, The Unforgiven, and Creeping Death. They are deducted points for the St. Anger album.
D. Metallica has always been an insane live show, but thanks to Hetfield's sometimes drunken and often asshole laced rants, they are deducted points. Oh, and more points deducted for your ridiculous ticket prices. You're filthy rich you assholes, cut us a break!
E. Metallica may be the band with the most merchandise in Hot Topic. Deduction.
MEGADETH

GOOD

Megadeth began the 80's with Killing is My Business... and Business is Good! which started the official thrash war with Metallica.* Plus, this album is fast. Like holy shit Dave, lay off the smack fast.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/
*in Dave's head only

Peace Sell's was a landmark in thrash, showcasing not only Mustaine's catchy riffage, but also the politically driven lyrics which would fuel most of Mustaine's songwriting.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/
So Far, So Good, So What! features such headbangers as Set The World A Fire and 502. However, the most interesting song is In My Darkest Hour, in which Dave tells shit LIKE IT IS and wrote an anthem for every headbanger ever double crossed by a wretched jezebel.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

Good songwriting? Yep. Technical wizardy? Yep. Marty Fucking Friedman? Yep. Rust in Peace is the shining jewel in the Megadeth catalog and my personal favorite record. Guitarists, get your chops up if you want to hang with the riffage on this album. Oh, plus this also garnered the most baddest songs without interruption award.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

Countdown to Extinction was Megadeth's most commercially successful record, featuring the most well known track Symphony of Destruction. Skin O' My Teeth is the heaviest track.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/

More mainstream, but still a heavy record. A Toute Le Monde, Blood of Heroes, Youthanasia, all good things.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/

2004's The System has Failed brought us the long awaited return to the thrash from Dave and crew. Finally, they were heavy again. Kick the Chair wouldn't look out of place on any 80's thrash record.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

First of all, Brad does not approve of redesigning Vic. The album is a more modern thrash, but features the excellent tracks Sleepwalker, Washington is Next, and Never Walk Alone. Other tracks like Burnt Ice (omg clever) and an unnecessary remake of A Toute Le Monde make it not as awesome.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

Lucky for us, Dave is as angry as he's ever been, and the album is once again politically charged. It's not excellent, but I'm just glad he hasn't wrote a Jesus anthem at this point.
Rating: \m/ \m/ \m/

A. Megadeth is a revolving door of membership thanks to Dave Mustaine being, in so many words, an asshole. At the time of this post, the entire band behind Dave may have changed, and I can't even keep track of who's in the band anymore. Deduction.
B. Dave Mustaine has always been known for his monster riffage. Plus, Metallica has never had a guitarist who could sniff the ability of Marty Friedman. I wish he'd come back from Japan and play Rust in Peace. :(
C. The songwriting has always been a strongpoint for Mustaine, partly because no one can deliver the lyrics in the style that he does. Points deducted for Risk being almost as big of an abomination as St. Anger. Oh, plus he's pissed off all the time. That helps.
D. The live show depends entirely on the era you saw them. If you saw them when Dave was drunk or on drugs, well you'll get 15 minutes of speeches and rants inbetween the 45 minutes of music. Points deducted for being an asshole, but points given for drunken ranting.
E. Megadeth has a good selection of t-shirts in Hot Topic, but that's about where the merchandise ends. Unfortunately for Dave, Megadeth can't keep up with Metallica due to a smear campaign in merchandise placement.
CONCLUSION
The epic battle between Megadeth and Metallica has concluded. So, who wins? Well after all of my studying of graphs and pie charts, plus my awesomness rating system, I hereby declare the winner as...

THE METAL FANS.
Yes, after much debate, I've concluded that the real winners happen to be the fans of the music. Both bands have released a fine catalog of music. Who gives a shit about Metallica vs Megadeth? The entire "debate" is laughable. Leave it for the high schoolers who are trying to figure out who is more br00tal than the other.
Stop debating. Start headbanging. Support metal.
THE END


















